You're such a R*t@rd!

You're such a retard! How often do you hear that phrase? How often do you say that phrase? Just take your average day.Some say it once a day and some lots more. It's a phrase that sometimes sets off the bells,whistles and flashing lights in my head other times just something that catches my attention like the words lemon pie.

Regan is the reason that hearing that phrase catches my ears. Yes, my child has mental retardation. My child has has a diagnosis that contains mentally retarded in the description. Ouch! Almost five years to deal with that one. Is it always a bad thing? No, not to us. Regan looks at the world like no other person I have ever met. He doesn't see race,sex,size, ability,disability or any other adjective, he sees people. People that he can wave to, smile at, tell them about football,cars, golf cart rides or motorcycle rides he wants to take. He is the kid that if the window is down in the car and he sees someone outside in their yard he yells HEY!! and waves like he has known them for all his short life. He doesn't let many people pass him in a store without speaking to them. He will hug a complete stranger and love on them like they were one of his family members. He wakes up with nothing but excitement for that day might be filled with McQueen, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, playing cars and chicken. Four of life's greatest pleasures to him. He doesn't and probably won't care how much money he has in the bank,what kind of car he is riding around in, what the stockmarket is doing that day or any other thing that we "typical" people care about. What a way to live! He looks for the good in all and sees it even when we don't take the time to glance at people. I sometimes wish I had the ability to see the good in people,to forgive quickly and love with no bounds.

So maybe we need to change the meaning of that phrase. Maybe it shouldn't be considered a bad thing but an adjective that we all strive to be. I used to get furious when someone said that around myself or Regan but now I'm to the place that it isn't such a bad thing. It reminds me to be thankful for all the accomplishments that Regan has achieved, it makes me remember 20 or so years ago when the doctors would recommend that kids like Regan be put away, that every day changes the perception of people and that my child will help change the way people think of "Retards". Maybe one day you will tell some one "You're such retard" and mean it to be that you are one of the most wonderful people on earth.